Uncle Dick and Lisa's Old Time Animal Tales

During a series of meetings in New York city, one of the delegates from the Baltimore Temperance Society related the following:-[We copy from the American Temperance Union.]-Weekly Message.
Mr. Pollard concluded the meeting. He said he was a kind of an old Butcher to bring up the rear. In his drinking days, he was the companion of a man down in Anne Arundel county, who had a Monkey which he valued at a thousand dollars. We always took him out to the chestnut parties. He shook all our chestnuts for us, and when he could not shake them off he would go to the very end of a limb and knock them off with his fist. This was great sport for us.
One day we stopped at a tavern and drank freely. About half a glass of whiskey was left and Jack [The Monkey.] took the glass and drank it all up. Soon he was merry, skipped, hopped, danced, and had all in a roar of laughter. Jack was drunk. We all agreed, six of us, that we would come back to the tavern next day and get Jack drunk again and have sport all day. I called in the morning at my friend’s house. We went out for Jack. Instead of being on his box, he was not to be found. We looked inside and he was crouched up in a heap. Come out here, said his master. Jack came out on three legs, his fore paw was on his head. Jack had the head-ache. I knew what was the matter with him. He felt just as I felt many a morning. Jack was sick and could not go. So we put it off three days. We each met, and while drinking, a glass was provided for Jack. But where was he? Skulking behind the chairs. Come here, Jack, said his master, and drink, holding out the glass to him. Jack retreated, and as the door opened he ran out, and in a moment was on the top of the house.
His master went out and called him down. He would not come. He got a pole and shook at him. Jack sat on the roof and would not come. His master got a gun and pointed it at him. A monkey is much afraid of a gun. Jack slipped over the back side of the roof. His master then got two guns and planted them on each side of the house, when the monkey seeing his bad predicament, at once whipped up on the chimney and down holding on by his forepaws. That monkey lived twelve more years and could not be made to taste one drop of whiskey again. The monkey had more sense than a man who thinks himself the first of all creatures.